Pause..just for a moment...

and read this. You will be glad you did.

Yet I will rejoice in the Lord.......

17 Although the fig tree shall not blossom, neither shall fruit be in the vines; the labour of the olive shall fail, and the fields shall yield no meat; the flock shall be cut off from the fold, and there shall be no herd in the stalls:

18 Yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will joy in the God of my salvation.

19 The LORD God is my strength, and he will make my feet like hinds' feet, and he will make me to walk upon my high places.

Habakkuk 3:17-19

Times are hard for so many of us. Some of us have been crying out for a long time, waiting on God.

God.....I need a job.......

Lord......I need healing.......

Father......I need deliverence.......

Jesus......just show me You are there......

Don't stop crying out. Don't grow weary. Just keep going through the motions if that's all you have. Just keep going.......

Hey Brad- this one's for you!

Sorry we didn't get to talk long. You have been through a lot and I just wanted to take the time to share some things that helped me when life kept beating me down.

This song is called The Wilderness and it's by the Supertones (Am I showing my age?) It played in my car daily and loudly after Todd died. To this day it moves me in a way I can't explain, I hope you can listen to it and that it blesses you.




Just in case you don't get a chance to listen, here are the words:

The rain falls on the righteous and the wicked
Mine is not to reason why this is
In this I rest in this I find my refuge
That my thoughts and ways are not His

I spend my life on looking up the answers
It's rare that I can't find a reason why
But reasons fail at children without mothers
His plan is more than I can know

Have you ever held in doubt
What this life is all about
Have you questioned all these things
that seem important to us
Do you really wanna know
Or are you a little scared
You are afraid that God is not really
exactly what you'd have Him be
What should I hold to and what should I do
How do I know if anything's true
I'm somewhere in-between Canaan and Egypt
A place called the wilderness

I'm not one who always trusts their feelings
I don"t believe in what you'd call blind faith
But faith that you can do all that you promised
And you said it all works for good
It's safe to say I don't see the big picture
I can't see the forest for the trees
And if five hundred lives
Were mine to get to know
You all could be spent on just this

God do you really understand what it's like to be a man
Have You ever felt the weight of
loving all the things you Hate
Have You struggled have you worried
How can You sympathize?

I have spoken too soon put my hand over my mouth
I can't contend with You
Your ways are so much higher
And we pass through the fire that
Christ endured before us
When You were in the wilderness

You know when John the Baptist was in jail he sent men to Jesus "Are you the one or do we look for another?" People disagree on this but I firmly believe John needed to hear Jesus say "Yes, I am the Way, the Truth and the Life. What you do for Me is not in vain. Your life has not been wasted and your hurts don't go unnoticed."

You have a lot on your plate: you are looking forward to some scary things and you have had a lot of disappointments. I guess all I am trying to say is that God is not afraid of the questions and I know that He has the answers for you, He had them for me.

Hey guys don't forget Brad and the guys serving our country! Please pray for them daily!

Discouragement.....

We have many seasons in our life. Sometimes everything seems right (although those times seem brief), then other times everything seems to go wrong. That's where I am right now. I apologize b/c this post is not a well thought out one; more it is a pouring out of the discouragement that I feel inside. Our refrigeration is slowly dying, our washing machine won't work properly, my computer keeps freezing, our oven is not heating properly.......I could go on and on. I am sure many of you could also. There is more broken than there is money to fix it, more to do than there is time to do it. I keep reminding myself, this too shall pass. I keep trying to focus on God and glorifying Him in the storm so that when I pass through I will know I have pleased Him. Interestingly as I was looking for a suitable picture I came across this photo I took last summer. I passed it by b/c I just didn't think a butterfly was suitable for the gloom and doom I feel inside. But, then I thought, no it is quite suitable. I imagine it got pretty dark waiting around in that cocoon!

²¹ Yet this I call to mind
and therefore I have hope:

²² Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.

²³ They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.

²⁴ I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him."

²⁵ The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him,
to the one who seeks him;

²⁶ it is good to wait quietly
for the salvation of the LORD.

Lamentations 3:21-26

I will sing of Your mercy.......

Although the fig tree shall not blossom, neither shall fruit be in the vines; the labor of the olive shall fail, and the fields shall yield no meat; the flock shall be cut off from the fold and there shall be no herd in the stalls; yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will joy in the God of my Salvation

Habakkuk 3:17-18


A song came on the radio while I was driving home today. I have heard it before, many times in fact but today it struck me. I just want to share the lyrics with you. May it speak to your heart as it did mine......

You have led me to the sadness
I have carried this pain
On a back bruised, nearly broken
I'm crying out to you


I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy

When death like a Gypsy
Comes to steal what I love
I will still look to the heavens
I will still seek your face

But I fear you aren't listening
Because there are no words
Just the stillness and the hunger
For a faith that assures


Alleluia, alleluia
Alleluia, alleluia

While we wait for rescue
With our eyes tightly shut
Face to the ground using our hands
To cover the fatal cut

And though the pain is an ocean
Tossing us around, around, around
You have calmed greater waters
Higher mountains have come down
Valley Song by Jars of Clay

It occurred to me......

Sometimes I threaten to spit at God!


Let me explain........this is Tia. Tia is our new guard Llama. I think she is beautiful and I love her. Just because. She has decided, however, that she does not love me. Not even a little. In fact this is her demeanor whenever I am around.......

and if I try to get any closer she lays her ears back, lifts her head and lets me know if no uncertain terms that if step any closer, she.is.going.to.spit.!! That's all fine and well, except the gnats are kinda bad this year and I really wanted to give her a bit of relief from their pesturing using a bit of fly spray. I know, it stinks and the spray can be a bit unnerving; but as we well know comfort and necessity rarely go hand in hand. I gave up. Llama spit is pretty gross.

And as often is the case, my mind turned to my relationship with God:

Rachel, you know that pet sin is really wrecking havoc in your life.....could I just.....

No, you cannot! Don't get any closer! I am perfectly happy with this sin and I think I will hang on to a little while longer, thank you very much.

And being the gentleman that He is, God does as I ask. He will not force His will on me, even when it is for my own good. He will simply wait, until I am ready to submit to His perfect way.

Revive Us Oh Lord........